Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
