screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
