After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Randomize