yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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