i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Randomize
