Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
How does it feel to date your dad?
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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