that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Randomize
