You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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