i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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