Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
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