She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
