This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
