Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
