I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize