I just made out with a guy for $7.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
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