I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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