Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
