"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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