We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize