the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize
