apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
that's an acceptable place to lick
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
