Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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