I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I need water and some morals
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Randomize
