hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize