return my video game
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize
