i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize