One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
