oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
