I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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