You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Randomize
