he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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