big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
