How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
