what day is it and did you see me today?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
