What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
