My brain says no but my pants say off.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
