Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
