home. puking in laundry basket.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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