I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
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