i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Randomize
