are you still at the devil's house?
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
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