it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
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