cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
