Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Randomize
