Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
jump out the window naked night went bad
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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