That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
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