I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize
