This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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