Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
