I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Two words: blizzard sex
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize
