just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize